BILLY JOEL: 'The River Of Dreams' (Columbia)

Touches of gospel, an intro that sounds like 'The Lion Sleeps Tonight', tinkly piano, lyrics about the promised land, loads and loads of backing vocals and something that sounds like children crying in the background. Or maybe that was me crying in the background. It's the new Billy Joel single, it's a bit of a confused mess, but it's agreeable and derivative enough to get bucket loads of radio play.