Mad Frankie Goes to Hollywood

IT'S AN offer you can't refuse. Well, not unless you want to explain your decision to a man who has spent 42 of his 75 years in maximum security prisons and mental institutions.

Having embraced the business they call show, The Kray's old adversary, 'Mad' Frankie Fraser, is looking for entrepreneurial types to bankroll the cinematic telling of his life story.

"I am now aware of a technological shift, brought about by high definition digital video, that has drastically reduced the costs of making low-budget feature films. This low-budget film-making is called Guerrilla Films," he says displaying an understanding of the industry that's positively Tarantino-esque. "To cut a long story short, I'm looking for an investor, or a group of investors, who can supply the production budget of #200,000, bearing in mind that myself and the majority of the production team will be on deferments - i.e. our fees will be paid only after the initial investment has been repaid in full.

"In the good old days getting hold of that sort of cash wouldn't have presented too many problems, but I'm talking about a legitimate business opportunity."

In other words, no one's going to have their teeth removed with a pair of pliers if they fail to cough up the leading man's per diems. Once the cast and production crew have got their wedge, the investors will receive 40% of all worldwide profits.

"The Blair Witch Project, which only cost $20,000, was sold at Cannes '99 for an advance against American rights for $1 million," he continues. "And closer to home Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrels will gross at least #10 million in the UK alone."

Frankie was more than a little peeved when the Daily Express revealed recently that no fewer than six gangster movies - Essex Boys, Love Honour And Obey, Honest, The Guv'nor, Diamonds and Pretty Boys - are currently being made by the majors.

"To say that I was disappointed when I read that is an understatement. It's no secret that I'd love to see my story immortalised on film, and as it appears that the conventional film industry wishes to impede that wish, I'm helping the wider community to help realise my ambition."

If the biopic doesn't pan out, he can always fall back on the album he's made with Tricky, Product Of The Environment. Gangsta rap in the truest sense, the collection also features the East End charms of Charlie Richardson, Jack Adams, Tony Lambrianou and Freddie Foreman.

"The gangsters have set aside their differences for the recording," a spokesman reveals, "and may take part in a live gig at Wembley next year."

A nation of music lovers holds its breath.

www.madfrankiefraser.co.uk