Caught in the net

While nobody, least of all Caught In The Net, enjoys other people’s misfortunes, we did wet our Calvin Kleins last week when BBC News 24 interviewed a taxi driver in the mistaken belief that he was technology expert Guy Kewney.
The mix-up occurred when Kewney’s name was called out by a producer in Television Centre and the driver, who was waiting for a fare, held his hand up.
Minutes later, he was live on-air answering – or trying to answer – complex questions about the court battle between The Beatles’ Apple Corps and Apple Computer.
Making the episode even more unlikely is the fact that the as-yet-unidentified taxi man was black and African, and Mr. Kewney white and English.
Here’s how the drama unfolded...
BBC anchor: Were you surprised by this verdict today?
Cab driver: I am very surprised to see this verdict to come on me because I was not expecting that. When I came they told me something else and I am coming. So a big surprise anyway.
With regards to the costs involved do you think now more people will be downloading online?
Actually, if you can walk everywhere you are going to see a lot of people downloading the internet and the website and everything they want. But I think, eh, it is much better for development and, eh, to inform people what they want and to get the easy way and so faster if they are looking for...
You can hear the whole hapless and hilarious exchange at www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCzaeeaHTi4&search=bbc
From there it’s but a mere mouse-click to www.dogradiothailand.com, the world’s first podcast for pooches.
According to the director of the Dog2home Grooming School, Anupan Boonchuen, “Music improves the mood of dogs. At 9am, we may have a dog greeting show, in which we’ll repeat ‘sawasdee’ (‘hello’) over and over. If we say ‘sawasdee’, in some houses, the dog may lift both paws in response. In some houses, the dog may lift only one paw. It depends on the training.”
DJs on the fledgling station include Terrier Wogan, Barky Whelan, Ray Sniff Of The D’Arcy, Boney Fenton, Lick O’Shea, Collie Hayes, and Tony Black Labrador. Possibly.
Meanwhile, Cat Deeley has been approached to be the face of a new product – Eau de Stilton. Yup, in a bid to encourage people to eat more of their product, the Stilton Makers Association have created a parfum et atomizer, for women of, ahem, cheesy virtue. Get the full lowdown at www.stiltoncheese.com.
Which just leaves time for quick visits to www.snipurl.com/amputeegleeheehee (confessions of an unlicensed sex-change surgeon); www.avenueqthemusical.co.uk (No wonder Sesame Street are unhappy); and www.escorts.com/glossary.html (“tossing the salad” takes on a whole new meaning).