Kyla Cobbler: "All school teaches you is how to be socially acceptable and disciplined... If you’re like me, it was a fucking nightmare"

In a world of carefully curated, airbrushed and frankly phoney online content, Kyla Cobbler is an absolute tonic. If you’re unfamiliar with one of the fastest-rising names in comedy, head to her Instagram page for a glimpse into Kyla’s world and her 1.2 million followers, whom she affectionately refers to as, “The Parish”. Having been diagnosed with dyspraxia, dyscalculia and dyslexia in her last year of school, writing Happy, Thank You. More, Please really pushed Kyla out of her comfort zone.

“I don’t think there’s ever a right time to write a book, to be honest. It’s very hard, and it takes a lot of fucking mental space. It was a very challenging experience,” she admits.

While it is of course her memoir, at its core is Kyla’s belief in the power of the universe and manifestation. Her mantra, and the title of the book, Happy, Thank You. More, Please is her way to practise gratitude and move with positivity through the world. Kyla implores us to focus on the good stuff in life, especially the little wins, like when the green man comes on when you reach the curb. Have many of Kyla’s friends adopted her mantra?

“I don’t have loads of friends, I have a lot of people in my life and around me, but yeah, my friends use it religiously. It’s very beautiful, and it’s very powerful, and I think it’s very simple, especially for Irish people,” she considers. “I grew up in quite a religious background. Nothing crazy, like most Irish people.

“Then you hit 18, and you leave school and you leave the Church and everything else, and it isn’t part of your life as much, but I always missed prayer. I always believed very deeply in the power of words, and the practise of repetition.

“There’s an expression by Rumi. It says, ‘The words we speak become the house we live in.’ I truly believe in the power of what you say, so ‘Happy. Thank you. More, please’ is this little wink from the universe. It’s an affirmation that I can use. It’s quick and it’s easy, and it suits every occasion. It just heightens the frequency, you know what I mean?”

I really do. Since reading her book, I’ve been practising her five-word mantra for things as simple as a boiled egg turning out just the way I like it – and it feels good.

“Jess, I’m so delighted to hear that now,” Kyla enthuses. “That’s the perfect situation where you’re like, ‘Fucking yes. It’s gonna be a good day.’”

Kyla is an undeniably upbeat person, but she’s had her fair share of struggles throughout her 35 years on planet earth. School wasn’t a fun time.

“People used to always say to me, ‘School’s the best years of your life’,” she reflects. “I was like, ‘I fucking hope not!’ I think that if you’re any way different to what society wants as a woman, and you’re not that girly girl, when you go out into the world you can feel lost.

“School teaches you discipline, getting up in the morning, getting it done, but it’s just one slice of life, a very thin slither of life. All school teaches you is how to be socially acceptable and disciplined. If you’re academic and you’re thriving, great, but if you’re like me, it was a fucking nightmare.”

Kyla may not have been academic, but her strong work ethic and street smarts took her to Greece and Australia, followed by what she considers a life-changing move to Italy. Arriving without a word of Italian, Kyla went from slogging in bars and restaurants to working her way into the fashion industry in Milan. Living with her dashing Italian boyfriend, Alfonso, things looked pretty perfect from the outside.

“When I was in that relationship, there were no words for coercive control or manipulation,” she says. “We didn’t have any of those words and when you don’t have language around something, it’s really hard. That’s why I was very adamant about putting it all in the book.”

Alfonso was a master manipulator who controlled what Kyla wore and ate and how she spent her time. When Kyla discovered he was cheating on her, she broke free and regained her spark. A move to Barcelona in early 2020 inadvertently sparked her career in comedy as she began to post her candid, hilarious reels on Instagram during the first Covid lockdown.

Being herself and being totally real is what gained Kyla her popularity, particularly amongst women. She is a matriarch, encouraging her followers to be strong and fit, “Furious and Jacked” rather than succumbing to diet culture. I ask her what her hope is for womankind.

“For my daughter? I hope that, we can fucking free bleed, bro. I hope that we don’t have to shove anything up our fannies anymore,” she says. “I hope that we just free bleed, and that everyone knows what the luteal phase is, everyone knows what the follicle phase is, everyone knows what ovulation is, and it’s respected, and they change the systems to suit us. That’s what I fucking hope. I hope that everyone is educated about it, we understand it, and we use it to our advantage.

“I say this time and time again, this world is not built for us. If you feel like you’re not thriving, and you’re not in a place that you want to be in, that’s not your fault. You are in a world that is built for you to fail. I am so convinced of that. Men have made this world, and they’ve made it for themselves, and they knew nothing different. But now that we know, it’s time to make steps, and change, and educate each other. I do it through humour, and fun, and craic.”

Kyla Cobbler at Electric Picnic. Credit: Saoirse McAllorum

Kyla’s online content is always fun, but she doesn’t shy away from talking about issues like Palestine and the Irish fuel protests.

“No, I don’t. I was very adamant about not being an influencer, so I’ve never actually done a brand deal, I’ve never worked with brands,” she explains. “I have the freedom to be able to talk about things when they occur that feel important to me, or resonate with me. I can be nothing but myself, and it’s never been a question for me when shit gets real. I don’t always necessarily preach. It’s more, this is what I think, and I feel we should talk about it.”

For Kyla, open conversations are very important. It’s okay for us to disagree.

“Two things can be true at the same time,” she says. “We can disagree and we can talk. I miss that about working in the pub. I would sit behind the bar in these country pubs, and have, like, eight men in front of me – a few of them would be right wing, a few would be left wing, and one or two of them wouldn’t have a clue what’s going on, you know? We’d all just talk about stuff, and it was never an attack on anyone. It’s just an open conversation in a very relaxed way.

“True growth comes from understanding each other, not from ganging together on one side. We need to heal each other and talk to each other to make it better for everyone, you know what I mean? The algorithm feeds us our own opinion over and over again, that’s very dangerous.”

Kyla did her first open mic in Barcelona on May 16, 2021. Five years later, she has sold out the 3Arena, is launching a book, and recently played Electric Picnic. Her faith in herself and the universe seems to be working out just fine. Having achieved so much in the last few years, what’s next for the First Lady of Ballincollig?

“I just want to keep showing up,” she asserts. “I want to keep doing it. I’m never gonna be cynical, I’m never gonna be angry about it, I’m gonna keep being grateful. I’ll keep showing up, keep crushing, and just blow the fucking roof off everything. That’s what I wanna do, world domination. I’m in!”

• Kyla Cobbler brings her Not My Lemons tour to Dublin’s 3Arena on Feb 26, 2027. Happy, Thank You. More, Please is out now.