'Art Of Darkness
What is humanity's greatest achievement? Language? The Voyager mission? The internet? Forget all that shit and kneel before The Darkness. Recall Voyager, replace that crappy gold record with this one, and let alien races shudder at how much arse our species can truly kick.
This masterpiece allows one to feel a little of what those monkey men in 2001: A Space Odyssey must have, when confronted with that big black yoke from outer space. If the current axis of arseholes do succeed in killing us all, well, we'll always have Paris. And this record. Preferably in Paris. With a gaggle of young ones, and old Beaujolais wine.
Ever listened to Queen and thought, "this is alright, I suppose, but I'd prefer something a bit more over the top"? Well, think no more! Literally, stop thinking! But before you do, acknowledge Roger Taylor's son, Rufus Tiger Taylor (yes, his real name), on drums - for what other royal rock bloodline could boast the refinement and breeding necessary to steer The 'Ness?
Wordsworthian couplets like "Stone cold foxes screaming in the front row/ Sacred promise of fellatio", and song titles such as 'Buccaneers Of Hispaniola', 'Japanese Prisoner Of Love' and 'Lay Down With Me, Barbara' warrant the Ivor Novello, the Jules Rimet, lifetime membership of Aosdána, your first born. Just give them fucking everything!
A lethal combination of Lizzy style harmony guitars and the high pitched vocals of a young Robert Plant with his balls in a vice, I should really review it using the Richter scale. If you hear a more rockin' record this year, this century, I will gladly surrender my Son-Of-Snort ceremonial cock ring.
Having played a cracking Olympia gig in 2013, The Darkness have decided to road test material from their new album with an Irish club tour that takes in the Spirit Store, Dundalk (March 6); Nerve Centre, Derry (7); Whelan's, Dublin (8); Monroe's, Galway (13); Dolan's, Limerick (14) and Bridge House, Tullamore (15).Read More
The Darkness have all but finished writing their upcoming album and in terms of inspiration, it was all about location, location, location. In this case, an island off our own coast.Read More
The Darkness live at the Olympia Theatre on Sunday, November 24th, 2013Read More
They're coming to The Olympia this November.Read More
Comeback kids The Darkness dish the dirt on their reunion, explain why they’re happy to ride Lady Gaga’s coat-tails and tell us that they don’t care if they annoy Radiohead anoraks.Read More
Justin Hawkins and co return with 'Everybody Have A Good Time'...Read More
Justin Hawkins and friends reunite for a rocking show at the famous Dublin venueRead More
Reunion tour stops off at the Olympia this DecemberRead More
The Darkness’ Justin Hawkins is sick of being wilfully misqouted by unscrupulous scurvy hacks.Read More
Those rock'n'rollers The Darkness will be playing the Meteor Awards, which take place on Thursday February 2 - but you can't get your tickets the normal way.Read More
Despite the big guitars, big chorus and witty one-liners, this is a long way from the cheeky chappy, thumbs-up image of The Darkness that we’ve come to expect.Read More
Those rock'n'roll scallywags The Darkness announce a live treat for Belfast and Dublin crowds.Read More
The problem facing The Darkness now is surely that, with the element of surprise has gone, the catsuits, falsetto vocals and silly videos are going to have to take second place to the music. Problem? What problem? Yes, you might never again experience the jaw-dropping sensation of hearing ‘Growing On Me’ for the first time but ‘One Way Ticket’ is a solid enough next step, blessed with an obviously bigger budget, the understated touch of Queen producer Roy Thomas Baker and, as they so eloquantloy put it, a big, fuck off rock chorus.Read More
The Darkness couldn’t take the place of the Thin White Duke in our hearts, but they truly are an irresistible force of glam-rock delight. Music geniuses or not, the camera sweeping through the crowd showed that, at this stage, we were only capable of pointing open-mouthed and all we wanted were simple gestures of sensory pleasure. The jumpsuit is half the battle.Read More
The Darkness and Ash have just been confirmed for this summer's Tennets ViTal festival in BelfastRead More
The Darkness, Iggy Pop and Paul Oakenfold have been confirmed the support acts for Madonna's Slane headliner on August 29.Read More
The Darkness join David Bowie as one of the acts being mooted for a headline spot at Witnness.Read More
What time is it fans? Yes, it’s that time of year again – the time of the Sam Snort Christmas party, the hooliest hooley of them all.Read More
Ho ho ho! Check out The Darkness' cover artwork for their forthcoming single 'Christmas Time (Don't Let The Bells End)'Read More
Genital warts, cherry popping, male pattern baldness, archery and kate moss… it's access and, indeed, excess all areas as hotpress readers subject darkness mainman Justin Hawkins to a thorough probing.Read More
The Darkness will make an in-store appearance at HMV prior to their sold-out Vicar St. gig.Read More
David Lee Roth will descend on Dublin late November, while The Darkness embark on their Elf Hazard Christmas TourRead More
They came, they saw and they rocked like bastards!Read More
Hot Press is meeting The Darkness - and we want you to help with the grillingRead More
Of all the musical trends that might have been expected this year, a grassroots cock rock revival is definitely one of the least likelyRead More
The classic rock riff merchants descend upon Dublin this OctoberRead More