The Future Is Now At Paris Haute Couture Fashion Week

It's 2014; the mid-teens; still the beginning of the 21st century. This generation laughs at previous generations' ideas of today; their future. A lot of pre-nineties Hollywood predictions of post-millennial medicine, architecture, technology and fashion look silly. Post 2012, we know for sure that productions like Thunderbirds and Back to the Future were wrong about everything. Right?

But what's that? 3D printing technology? Google Glass? Smart phones? Advances in medical science meaning real body parts can be grown artificially and artificial body parts work almost like real ones? Add to these the Paris Haute Couture Fashion Week catwalk, with its space-age tailoring and metallic, diesel-punk uniforms and Effie Trinket style hats and dresses and we have the past's vision of the future in the present.

On the runway, Acne's soft knits, unstructured basics and intense colours were contrasted with wide, clunky sandals, oversized aeroplane-seatbelt style belts and oddly shaped white hats. This made the models look a bit like they were auditioning for a remake of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Their lack of makeup, bold or bleached eyebrows and straight, short fringes brilliantly brought the bold trends of last year to a head.

Naturally, Atelier Versace's collection was inspired by Grace Jones, with a bit of Gaga thrown in for good measure. Low necklines, short shorts and hoods on everything created a wonderfully updated space-age vibe. A little bit Star Wars, made royal with Karlie Kloss's deep purple fur and with fully metallic outfits on many of the other models. Not quite Xena, but more than worthy of her Warrior Princess title.

Schiaparelli's collection may have been inspired by L. Frank Baum's Oz stories (straw witch's hat, anyone?), or maybe it was The Hunger Games. Wherever the inspiration came from, the collection screams Utopian nightmare. Overly choppy and colourful hair, huge, unwearable headpieces and ruffles in unexpected places were the highlights of the show. Franck Sorbier and Stephane Roland both took a similar approach to their dresses, though no head-wear or hairstyle a real 21st century human would not wear reared its head at these shows.

Charlie Le Mindu's models' hair and makeup was unique in a different way, with glowing neon fiber-optic wigs stealing the show.

On Aura Tout Vu took the pseudo-diesel-punk look to the extreme with his'n'hers sparkly-armored white captains' outfits , complete with hats and pearl-embroidered shoulder pads.

Of course, one can never talk about Haute Couture without mentioning Chanel. Slightly more traditional and in keeping with previous collections, Karl Lagerfeld's SS14 collection was once more all about old fashioned patterns, tailoring and a pastel colour palette. This time, however, pretty dresses were paired with matching runners, and catwalk hair was styled to look like fur. Simultaneously standing out and fitting in with the rest like only Lagerfeld can. He used metallic eyeliner, belts, elbow pads and knee pads to create a cooly futuristic look that perfectly offset the pretty, soft aesthetic Chanel is famous for.

And so it seems the present is the past's semi-correct prediction of the future. That sounds complicated, so I'll put it simply (and perhaps cynically): There are no completely new ideas in fashion. Challenge yourselves, designers. Give us something we haven't seen before. Create our future.