Swede dreams are made of this

It’s the audio-visual moment of the decade: a stocking and suspendered Kylie Minogue reaching near orgasm on a mechanical horse, while The Hives’ ‘Main Offender’ plays away in the background.

Originally intended as an Australia-only cinema ad for her Delinquent range of underwear, it can now be found on appreciative desk-tops worldwide. Including one in the small Swedish industrial town of Fagersta.

“It’s quite a performance, isn’t it?” laughs Hives lead singer Howlin’ Pelle Almqvist. “Normally we say ‘no’ to our music being used like that, but Kylie was a special case. We thought it’d be shown in Australia for two weeks and then forgotten but, as you say, somebody put it on the internet and it’s traveled round the world. What I’m upset about, though, is that we didn’t get to meet her.”

And discuss musical collaborations?

“No, I had something rather different in mind.”

Down boy! Sadly for Almqvist and his bandmates, there was no sign of Ms. Minogue when they ushered the New Year in on Bondi Beach.

“We finished playing at ten and then went surfing, which is a bit different to what we’re used to in Sweden,” he resumes. “I don’t know if I’d want to live in a place where the weather’s the same all the time, though. I enjoy seeing the seasons change and going curling (an ice and sweeping-brush assisted version of bowls – Ed) with the other guys in the band. The six months of darkness is a bit depressing, but I like Fagersta and don’t plan on moving away from here.”

Unrelenting winters aside, what are the town’s attributes?

“Er, there are some nice forests nearby and a lot of ponds which is good if you play ice hockey. Two guys from Fagertsa have gone on to play in the NHL – they’re our local celebrities. Otherwise, it’s like a miniature Detroit with everything built around the steel industry. The population’s only 12,000, so everybody knows everybody else.”

For the benefit of those who’ve been on Saharan expedition, 2001 saw The Hives join The Strokes and White Stripes as one of the triumvirate of bands that everybody’s raving about. And quite right too.

Already a household name in hipper Swedish abodes, there’s a swagger about them and their songs which is destined to have whiny post-rockers running to the hills with their underachieving tails between their legs. Take it from someone who’s long enough in the tooth to remember the first coming of punk – Howlin’ Pelle, Vigilante Carlstroem, Nicholaus Arson, Chris Dangerous and Dr. Matt Destruction (not necessarily their real names) are going to be so famous they won’t know what to do with all the supermodels.

“We’ve always made a wonderful noise – even if for the first few years it was just in our heads!” Howlin’ Pelle smiles. “Y’know, we were 13 and 14-year-old kids who knew how we wanted to sound, but weren’t good enough at playing our instruments to make it a reality. I lost count of the number of gigs that started off okay, fell apart in the middle and ended with us rowing on stage. It was cool, though, because being the baby band locally, people would forgive us and come to our next show.”

While never less than fully committed to their art, the adolescent Hives quickly realised that being in a band was a good way of getting your jollies.

“Especially when you lie about your popularity. Two of the guys were living in another town half-an-hour away from here, and went round telling everybody how huge we were in other parts of the country. The Swedish music press weren’t writing about punk rock then, so they had no way of checking. That’s my advice to young bands – lie!

“Anyway, it took about five years before we felt we were ready to release a record which we did on a label here called Burning Heart. At the same time we were still at school and studying for exams which, somehow, we managed to pass.”

Who did the teenage Howlin’ Pelle pretend to be when he was throwing shapes in the mirror?

“Various punk rock bands that you’ve never heard of because they sung in Swedish, and Angus Young,” he divulges. “I didn’t realise until recently that he was a midget! AC/DC are the – what’s the word? – epitome of dumb genius. They’ve rewritten the same song a hundred times and it still sounds brilliant.”

While we’ve got him in reflective mood, let us once and for all clear up the Randy Fitzsimons mystery. Is Mr. Fitzsimons a real person, or is it a Hives-ian attempt to invent a Malcolm McLaren-style figure?

“No, he’s real. It’s a guy we know who’s like the sixth member of the band, but doesn’t want to be in the photos. He’s part of the creative process in that he comes up with ideas that we make into songs. He doesn’t really play an instrument, so he describes the sounds and we translate them for him. The British music press have turned it into a big deal, which it isn’t really.

“Is he the same age as us? I can’t tell you!”

Ooh, the tease! Rather than going into a long-winded description of their oeuvre, it’s easier to tell you that The Hives’ favourite albums – in no particular order – are AC/DC For Those About To Rock (We Salute You); Dead Boys Young, Loud & Snotty; Sonics Here Are The Sonics; Mitch Ryder & The Detroit Wheels Detroit Breakout!; Cyndi Lauper She’s So Unusual; MC5 Back In The USA; The Saints Eternally Yours; The Best Of The Ronettes; New Bomb Turks Destroy O’Boy; The Strokes Is That It; and Little Richard The Speciality Sessions.

“Little Richard is probably my favourite singer of all time,” HP divulges. “To be black in rock ‘n’ roll was confrontational enough, but wearing pancake make-up and a pompadour…that was really getting up white America’s nose! People think that debauchery and bad lifestyles are something that ‘70s bands invented, but read his autobiography, The Life & Times Of Little Richard, and you realise it already existed in ‘55.”

How do The Hives rate in the decadence stakes?

“We have moments of really bad decadence followed by long periods of feeling sorry for ourselves and going to bed early. A lot at the same time is better than a little every day – even if it does nearly get you arrested!”

Argy bargy with the boys in blue? Tell us more.

“Madrid is always dangerous ‘cause people stay up all night, but the last time we were there we got really, really drunk and had to run away from the police. What did we do? We want to go back there some day, so nothing, absolutely nothing!”

Not content with being world famous in Sweden, The Hives decided last year to find other record companies to spread the word. The label who made millions out of Rancid, Epitaph, got the nod in America while a totally besotted Alan McGee was entrusted with the UK.

“I was in my hotel room in Japan watching boring music TV when The Hives’ ‘Hate To Say I Told You So’ video came on,” coos the Poptones supremo. “I thought, ‘Great, who the fuck are this band?’ I got back to England to find that they’d played my Radio4 club and the whole office was going mental about them. I then got the album and my suspicions were confirmed – The Hives are the greatest garage punk – or whatever you want to call it – band on the planet. Meanwhile England is going through a ‘New Acoustic’ movement. Fuck that shit, salute The Hives!”

Within three months of that bedroom encounter, McGee had taken the best bits of their Sweden-only Veni Vidi Vicious and Barely Legal albums and repackaged them as Your New Favourite Band (catalogue number MC5055).

“I couldn’t understand what he was saying at first because of the accent, but as soon as I got past that I really liked him,” Almqvist reflects. “If Alan promises something it happens, which is what you want from a record company. That and actually liking your music. We have a policy that we don’t work with a record company unless the guy in charge is a fan of the band. The other thing about Alan is that he’s rich – he doesn’t need to cheat us out of money because he’s got enough of his own!”

Along with larging it in Madrid, one of the perks of being in a happening band is that you get to meet your punk rock heroes.

“We played with The Saints in Holland, which seeing as Eternally Yours is my all-time favourite punk album, was a huge deal. We’ve also hung out with Jello Biafra and one of the guys who was in The Dead Boys, Cheetah Chrome.”

Ah yes, I remember seeing The Dead Boys on the same bill as The Damned and The Saints in 1977.

“You saw all three of them together? Fuck, I’m jealous! The most star-struck I’ve been was when The Nomads did a 20th anniversary show at a festival in Sweden. The last song was a version of ‘Kick Out The Jams’ featuring them, Wayne Kramer, Jello Biafra, Chris Bailey and two of The Dictators. It was the most perfect four minutes of my life.

“Actually, ‘Kick Out The Jams’ was the record we played on the tour bus when we drove into Detroit for the first time. The MC5 were tough, but at the same time gay looking with their sequins and Afros. We always pick a band who are from the town we’re going to, which is easy if it’s New York or San Francisco but pretty hard if you’re gigging in South Dakota!

In a hundred words or less, what is Howlin’ Pelle’s definition of “punk”?

“A feeling of not caring what everybody thinks. Dumb teenage rebellion. It’s also about the music which, if you’re talking real punk rock, happened from ‘75 to ‘81. You can be punk rock now, but in attitude rather than the way you dress or sound. How’s that for an answer?”

Pretty damn good. Of course, The Hives aren’t the only bunch of foreign Johnnies who the British music press have been salivating over recently. Of the acts that readily spring to mind – The Strokes, Andrew WK, White Stripes and BRMC – who does Almqvist think is worthy of the superlatives?

“Hyped to infinity or not, I really do like The Strokes record,” he enthuses. “The White Stripes I haven’t listened to that much, but them being popular is cool ‘cause they come from the blues/punk scene that we were heavily into in ‘95. Andrew WK’s a bit too heavy metal for me, but I can see how it could make you happy. It’s dumb and loud and full of energy which are all good qualities. I’ve only heard the Black Rebel Motorcycle Club record once, but that single, ‘What Happened To My Rock ‘N’ Roll’, is great.

“While having all these wonderful things said about you is good, we know that one day they could decide, ‘The Hives? Oh, they’re yesterday’s news.’”

Finally, I’m contractually obliged to ask a couple of Swedish questions, so: King Carl Gustav and his brood, are they as crap as the Windsors?

“About the same. Once in a while they go and cut the ribbon at a tennis court or something, but that’s it. The daughters are in their teenage years now, so there are a lot of stories in the papers about them getting drunk and kissing boys.”

Who do Swedes tell jokes about?

“The Norwegians, who say the exact same jokes about us?”

Lay one on us.

“Do you know why Norwegians wear their pyjamas when motorbiking? Because they lie down on the curves.”

Is it me or does it lose a bit in the translation?

“They take the curves low and fall asleep… you’re right, it’s not very good!”

Another reason methinks for them not to give up the day job!