Caught in the net: Laughing all the way to the banksy

While Caught In The Net considers Paris Hilton to be a supremely talented individual whose fame has nothing to do with her super-rich family’s connections, there are those, UK graffiti artist Banksy for instance, who’d have you believe that she’s a vacuous stick insect who should fuck right off with her singing aspirations.
Wishing to articulate these sentiments in a post-modern fashion, the Bristolian spray-can merchant has smuggled 500 “renovated” copies of her debut Paris album into UK record stores.
The first clue that something is awry is supplied by the cover sticker, which promises such aural delights as ‘Why Am I Famous?’, ‘What Have I Done?’ and ‘What Am I For?’.
Inside, Ms. Hilton’s head has been replaced with that of a dog, and slogans like ‘Race To the Bottom Of The Pile’, ‘Thou Shalt Not Worship False Icons’, and ‘Every CD You Buy Puts Me Even Further Out Of Your League’ liberally slapped over the original, airbrushed-to-infinity artwork.
“I guess you can give an individual like Banksy a little bit of leeway for his own particular brand of artistic engagement,” says a not-that-bothered HMV spokesman. “And it might be that there will be some people who agree with his views on the Paris Hilton album.”
You can inspect the tampering at gossip.elliottback.com/2006/07/10/paris-hiltons-album-cover and his other work at www.banksy.co.uk.
It was rave reviews all round last week as This Film Is Not Yet Rated premiered in the States. Aiming to do for the US Film Censor’s Office what Fast Food Nation did for the hamburger industry, director Kirby Dick reveals the lucky and hitherto anonymous people who get to watch all that graphic sex and violence on the American public’s behalf. Most, they claim, either have children aged over 18 or no children at all; have zero media literacy; and display a clear anti-homosexual bias.
View the documentary trailer at www3.ifctv.com/thisfilm/cast.php.
Having reported two weeks ago that Paul Daniels has been getting rid of his unwanted tat on the interweb, CIN brings you details of “a unique course that will teach people the tricks and tips they need to become a successful eBay seller and make the most of the famous online marketplace. Using official teaching materials provided by eBay, students will discover how to create striking listings, how to monitor sales, how to simplify getting paid and the best ways to attract potential buyers.” Peruse the full syllabus at www.northamptoncollege.ac.uk/default.aspx.
Which just leaves time for quick visits to youtube.com/watch?v=mxS_lLGQ2KE (Anyone who finds the Panic At The Disco! singer being poleaxed by a bottleful of piss funny is sick); www.stevenseagal.com (He has a band. Oh dear); and www.sexinchrist.com/fist.html (JC is more broad-minded than we thought).