Hold It Against Me

There's no denying it. 'Hold It Against Me', Britney's first single in nearly two years, is cheddar cheese smeared onto a disco ball, but it also happens to be an undeniably banging club anthem. Clearly, someone in camp Spears has been keeping a keen eye on the charts - we're assuming that the eternal poplet was too busy approving Greatest Hits and Singles Collections to notice for herself that Eurofabulous thumps are now mandatory to place in the Top 20. If you can stop shimmying long enough to care, you'd almost feel sorry for The Bellamy Brothers, whose infamous chat-up tune 'If I Said You Had A Beautiful Body…' Brit has clearly pilfered. But then you'd probably remember that they haven't penned a worthy follow-up in over two decades. That's showbiz, folks.