A Blast From The Fast

As it turns out, Huey's not the only charmer in the band. When I meet Fast, the Fun Lovin' Criminals' multi-instrumentalist, in the Clarence Hotel's Octagon Bar his opening gambit is "So you work for hotpress? You are hot." While singer Huey sits in one corner doing press to promote The Voodoo Lounge, the new Dublin bar he co-owns with Dermot Doran, Fast, all flattery aside, is here to rapidly deliver details of the Crim's new album Loco, scheduled for release in February.

However, as his Clarenceburger goes cold on the table, we first cover such vital topics as specially-imported Camel Lights, where to get the best seafood in Dublin, and how Americans can't make good dance music (before forming FLC, Fast admits to being in "the world's worst" techno band).

Obviously eavesdropping, Huey approaches and warns, "You won't get any sense out of him when he starts rambling like this."

Nevertheless, we eventually get around to the new album and Fast is somewhat defensive at my suggestion that most of the new material is mellow and introspective.

"'The Biz' is not mellow. 'Dickholder' is not mellow," he cites. "Okay, there are a few mellow songs in a row, but that's not the whole album."

Is he perhaps sensitive about the fact that fans didn't take to the very laidback groove of last release Mimosa?

"What people didn't understand about Mimosa is that it was a collection of B-sides, which we put out 'cos no one bought our singles. We're not a band who sells a hundred million singles, like Spiller. With Mimosa people thought 'Oh God they're trying to be this mellow band, but that's not the case. That's why we're very proud of this record, 'cos I think even people who felt Mimosa wasn't for them will think this is a perfect mix of the first two records. It's got the comedy of the first record, but the production and the sound of the second."

You do a nice (and dare I say it, mellow?) version of Eric B & Rakim's rap anthem 'Microphone Fiend' on the new album.

"We tried to make like an acid jazz version. Our keyboardist friend Peter Levin did all the little pimped-out synthesiser solos 'n' stuff. But 'Loco' will be the first single. This is our first record with drummer Mackie and 'Loco' starts with a drum solo, so it has to be. It's a similar vibe to Boz Scaggs 'Lowdown,' a sort of rock song with a Latin touch."

And how about 'Swashbucklin' In Brooklyn'?

"It's a killer name," he enthuses. "People will see the poster & go, 'Swashbucklin' In Brooklyn'! That's the worst title ever!', but when they see the video, they'll get it. It's about this guy who works in Long John Silver's, a seafood restaurant where they wear pirate costumes. He's coming home from work one night and sees this girl getting assaulted by two dudes. He goes up, beats up these dudes, the chick goes home and tells her Pops that this pirate saved her. So he gets this idea to start patrolling around New York in a boat, saving people."

But Fast is at a loss when I ask about 'Underground', a strange little number, with lyrics that hint at a darker, more melancholic subject matter than the usual FLC song.

"Huey writes the lyrics, so he can tell you if we grab him for a sec. I can tell you that 'Run Daddy Run' is about the decline of Western civilisation," Fast recovers swiftly. "'Loco' is about hooking up with this girl even though her boyfriend who just passed away was your best friend. 'Bump' is about meeting this beautiful woman at a gay club. Ask anyone who isn't a homophobe and they'll tell you that the best looking girls are out at the gay night, 'cos if a girl's gonna go out and party with her friends, why's she gonna go where a bunch of drunks'll hassle her?"

So have you been to the George, yourself?

"Well, no, we don't frequent these places or anything, but Huey was a bartender at the gay club night 'Bump'. Gay dudes - they're nice, they tip, there's no fights, so for Huey it was like the perfect job. Oh, and 'The Biz' is about the state of the music industry."

Is it true you had plans to record an album with British gangster Reggie Kray before his death?

"God bless him, rest in peace, 'cos now at least he's finally free, for Christ's sakes." Any question as to whether he ever gets tired of all the gangster schtick is rendered unnecessary by the evangelical light in his eyes when he speaks of the legendary crime boss.

"The problem is, they wouldn't even let him record something. They wouldn't let us send him a tape thing with a mic, so the only way he could record his voice was over the phone, for like thirty seconds, with people coming in interrupting him. The album would never have got done. But one day we'd like to do it. We know there's recordings of his voice out there. If you incarcerate someone for the rest of their life, they ought at least to be able to say what's on their mind. They caged him up and then he died, so we ought at least to give him that.

"Another thing I can let you in on is we want to release a live record - not to be cheesy like Oasis - but we wanna film the shows. We'd love to do it in Dublin, the people are the greatest party people, but as far as the look goes, the Olympia is too small and the Point is too big. We're considering London's Brixton Academy. People who've wondered what we do when we walk offstage before the encore will be able to see that - we're not even in the same country in those ninety seconds. We also want to write a movie with its own album, like Pink Floyd's The Wall, not all psychedelic and stuff, but our own version and we'll get an up and coming star, like Bob Geldof, only someone who's goin' in the right direction..."

Fast is in full flow when the record company press exec tells us time's up, cruelly dashing my dreams of rounding off the evening with the boys in the Penthouse jacuzzi. The band still have a rake of journalists yet to see, before jetting off to the UK that evening. As I don my coat in the lobby, Fast dashes out to inform me that he's asked Huey about that song.

"You know, 'Underground'? Huey says, he had this dream, and when he woke up, he wrote a song about it." Well, that certainly clears that up. Cheers.

The Fun Lovin' Criminals play Dublin's Olympia Theatre on March 1, 2 and 3