Taliban, cybermen and getting ahead in advertising

Pining for the days when you’d get together with a few of your beardy mates and collapse a wall on a homosexual? If so, you should make an immediate beeline for www.talibanreunited.com, which is, “The simple way to find out what old terrorist chums and captives are doing now. Our database includes over 5,000 terrorist camps and flight training schools, Al-Qaida bases and mud huts.”

More cockle-warming still is the Bin Laden Memory Of The Day: “… I remember when he came into work one day and had a huge bag full of Kinder Surprise eggs for everyone. I got a little train to play with – it was great!”

This being our special student edition, Caught In The Net would like to welcome all third levelers and recommend a new course that’s being offered by San Francisco State University’s Multimedia Studies Program (you’d have thought that with them being an educational establishment they’d be able to spell properly).

“In Exploring Cybersexualities,” reports www.cobrand.salon.com/tech/features, “students get initiated into the technology mediated sexual underworld with step-by-step lessons in the juicy thrills of cybersex. It’s $100 for a two-day course on how to get off with a chip, a kind of guided tour of techie sex toys and smutty sites.” A thoroughly worthwhile addition to that H-dip in Applied Masturbation.

From cybersex to talking cybermen. Yup, £19.99 + £2.50 P+P buys you a robotic Dr. Who adversary that goes, “Eradicate the Timelord!”, “Emotion is a weakness!” and “Destroy Earth!”

www.prod-ent.freeserve.co.uk also does a nice line in radio-controlled Daleks and Carry On Cleo Kevin Williams’. Nah, stop messin’ about!

Were you aware that penguins only get jiggy with it twice a year? If not, you ought to be watching www.sextvthechannel.com which “explores and celebrates the power and mystery of human sexuality around the globe.” Elsewhere you can watch such thought-provoking fare as Love, Lust & The Ecstasy Of Orgasm, Monogamy, Cheaters & The Big Swing and Erotic Brothels. By the way, you can torture us all you like, but we’re not going to divulge which ex-hotpress scribe is mooting the idea of a travel book called Around The World In 80 Lays.

It’s only a matter of time before Sex TV screens 1001 Ways To Eat My Jizz…2. You can order your copy of this art house nugget from www.armageddonentertainment.com

Which just leaves us time to mention the baldy bloke who’s willing to have an advert tattooed on his head for $50,000 www.sponsormymelon.com and the new rival to Popbitch www.63ta.com who got into mucho trouble recently for offering a D-I-Y fake your own death kit.