Nimoy Keeps Swinging

A man who’s no stranger to circling Uranus, Leonard Nimoy has teamed up with San Francisco’s Fat Bottom Revue for his second book of nude photographs.

Not content with using fetish scene professionals like Pussy Flambe, Cyndi Irresistible, Mia More and Cookie Tuff – possibly not their real names – the Star Trek actor held an open audition for “plus-size/fat/voluptuous/big/thick performers of ALL genders. If you’ve ever fantasized about strutting your funky stuff in front of an adoring audience with the one-of-a-kind, award-winning Big Burlesque/Fat-Bottom Revue. NOW IS YOUR CHANCE!”

One assumes that the celebrity snapper will be keeping an eye open for Klingons on either bow, probing black holes and…okay, okay, we’ll stop now! Find out more at www.bigburlesque.com/home.html

We didn’t think our admiration for The Onion could get any greater, but it has thanks to the Irish-Heritage Timeline that graced their St. Patrick’s Day special. Here’s a small extract:

400 BC – Christian missionaries travel across Ireland, bringing guilt to the Irish people.

530 to 537 – St. Brendan makes a long sea voyage with a group of fellow monks, exploring distant lands to the West and besting Columbus’ discovery of America by a millennium. St. Brendan is the patron saint of bullshit.

For the whole kit and caboodle go to www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4111&n=12

We thought we were having our plonkers pulled as well, but no, Afghanistan really does have a burgeoning hip hop scene which can be checked out at www.afghanzmansion.com

While rhymers like Afgun, Cali Honeyz and Nazi – a stunningly beautiful 21-year-old who might want to consider a name change – are still light years behind the Americans they so obviously ape, it’s good to see a spot of yoof culture coming to a country where not long ago listening to music was a capital offence.

An update on Caught In The Net’s favourite spoofsters Beatallica – Lars Ulrich has enlisted the help of Metallica’s attorney to stop the Fab Four Horsemen Of the Apocalypse being sued by Sony for copyright theft.

Which just leaves time for quick visits to www.zonicweb.net/badalbmcvrs (Museum Of Bad Album Covers); pipslab.nl/graf (bullet camera SFX); www.ebaumsworld.com/celeb.html (stars without their slap).