Culture
03 Jun 08

Caught In The Net: Momma Said Knock You Out

Roy Keane’s playing days saw him involved in some memorable bust-ups, but as far as we can recall he never jumped into the stands while at Cobh Ramblers, Nottingham Forest or Man U and told his mum sitting in the posh seats to, “Sit yo’ your ass down!”

That’s what happened last week when 39-year-old Gloria James was so incensed by the foul perpetrated on her Cleveland Cavaliers son LeBron that she tried to clatter his Boston Celtics rival Paul Pierce.
“I told her to sit down with some language I shouldn’t have used,” the pro-basketball player admits. “Even though that’s my mother, the commissioner doesn’t care if it’s your mother or your kids or anybody. You can’t allow fans and players to get involved like that. And I can’t afford for my mom not to be at every last one of my games.”
Asked whether his mom could take LeBron’s mom, Pierce reflects: “My momma’s a little older, but she’s old school. She’s got some tactics.”
You can respectively read and see what happened at www.cleveland.com/cavs/index.ssf/2008/05/seen_and_heard_during_game_4_o.html and www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGLDZj0hu-Y&feature=related.
There’s more quality hot-headedness to be had at gawker.com/5008668/bill-oreilly-meltdown-resurfaces?autoplay=true where Fox anchor Bill O’Reilly – a man slightly to the right of Mussolini politically – can be seen fucking a hapless teleprompter operative out of it.
From there it’s but a mere mouse-click to the online home of Nick Ryan’s stunning A Lonely Sky short film, which is equal parts Memphis Belle and No Country For Old Men.
A Dublin-based commercial and music video director – his credits include Bovril, Boru Vodka and Arcade Fire’s ‘Rebellion (Lies)’ – Ryan’s mini-masterpiece can be viewed in its entirety at alonelysky.com and suggests that his next stop will be Hollywood.
Which just leaves time for quick visits to news.sbs.com.au/worldnewsaustralia/solar_bra_charges_phones_and_ipods__546990 (iPod-running solar powered bra); dinnerinabottle.com/english-breakfast (egg, bacon, sausage and baked bean-flavoured soft drink); hypem.com (cracking music blog site that Viacom is angling to buy); and www.reuters.com/article/televisionNews/idUSN0941895820080509 (Oscar-winning director makes new HBO series about large mickeyed sports coach).