Caught In The Net: I fought the gore...

Fans of Christopher Moltisanti and Carmine Lupertazzi’s cult zombie Mafia flick Cleaver will be delighted to hear that official t-shirts can be ordered online from store.hbo.com for $19.99.

Given Mr. Moltisanti’s recent trigger-happy behaviour, it’s an offer that you really shouldn’t refuse.
Incidentally, there are murmurings that HBO are in negotiations with Daniel Baldwin to turn the Sopranos spoof – “It’s about a wise guy with a big mouth and even bigger dreams” – into a proper movie.
Those rumours are given extra credence by the Making Of Cleaver mockumentary, which can be perused at www.youtube.com/watch?v=aWZehc-K2O4
There’s more life imitating art at www.englishrussia.com/?p=1000, which has details of a real-life crime-fighting Robocop.
“The six-foot tall egg-shaped robot which moves on four wheels is a joint project funded by the police and city authorities in Perm, eastern Russia,” they report. “It has video cameras and sensors inside it that relay pictures and data to police stations across the city, alerting officers about crimes.”
Unfortunately, rain caused the future of law enforcement to short-circuit after just three hours on the mean streets of Perm. Robocop will be back, though, as soon as repairs to its circuitry are completed.
Meanwhile, there’s some quality nutterdom to be had at www.worldsuperheroregistry.com/world_superhero_registry_gallery.htm, which has a list of real-life Bruce Waynes and Klark Kents.
These include Angle Grinder Man, a caped crusader who “patrols by night looking for unhappy drivers who’ve been clamped and then sets their cars free. An odd-job man by day, he operates in Kent during the week and in London on weekends. He decided to go full-time vigilante in May this year.”
Proving that superheroism isn’t an exclusively male domain is Terrifica who “trawls New York City’s bars, clubs, and streets by night looking for women who’ve had a little too much to drink and are in danger of being taken advantage of by men.”
From there it’s but a mere mouse-click to privatesculpture.co.uk/gallery7.html where £800 buys you an unique objet d’art.
“Internal vaginal casts are a new an exciting direction in my erotic lifecasts, where no sculptor has gone before,” explains their gynecologically inclined creator, Jamie McCartney. “The material and process used is harmless and painless and produces the most spectacular casts of the vagina ever made. These intriguing and sensual shapes reveal the mysteries and inner beauty of the female body. Fascinating to both men and women alike, these pieces have a powerful presence. You can see every hidden detail, from the tight muscle bands at the entrance to the cervix deep inside.”
Which just leaves time for quick visits to snipr.com/flickr_fun (good loving gone baaaaaaaad); www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxAYHOWxGi8 (‘90s anti crystal-meth commercial); and www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=6216878 (brief jerky anyone?).