Caught In The Net

Following in the proud footsteps of Christian Motorsports Illustrated and Modern Ferrett – real titles, kids! – former Sunday Times, VIP and Stars On Sunday man John Ryan has debunked to the States and started his own niche magazine, The New York Dog.

Has he gone barking mad? It appears not with Jay Leno and Ellen DeGeneres both giving the 109-page glossy an on-air namecheck, and write-ups in everything from USA Today to The Japan Times.

Regular features include Off The Leash (“Here is the news. But for dogs”); What I’ve Learned From My Dog (“Celebrities dish on what they’ve learned from their four-legged friends); Extreme Canine Makeover (“An abandoned pup gets some TLC. And a new fur-doo”); and – a touch of genius, this – Rex In Peace (“A powerful and moving obituaries section”).

“These are not death notices or part of the classified section,” explains the magazine’s Gregg Oohler. “They’re actual obituaries: beautifully written, incredibly moving pieces, paying tribute to dogs that have died in the last month from all over America.”
Find out more at www.thenydog.com

Caught In The Net’s older readers will enjoy the special edition of ‘70s kids’ show Rainbow, which can be found at rainbow.arch.scriptmania.com
A veritable innuendo-fest, it features such marvellous exchanges as:
Geoffrey (to camera): “Hello everybody, today we are talking about playing.”
Bungle: “Playing with each other, Geoffrey?”
Geoffrey: “Yes Bungle, do you have a special friend you like to play with?”
George: “Yesterday we played with our balls. Are we going to play with our friend’s balls today?”
Bungle: “Yes, and we can play with our twangers as well.”
Geoffrey (to camera): “Have you seen Bungle’s twanger?”
Zippy: “Oh I have, I showed him how to pluck with it. I’m the best plucker here.”
George: “And I’m good at banging. My peg’s hard isn’t it Zippy?”
Zippy: “Well of course it is, your peg wouldn’t go in if it was soft.”
And that’s before Jane arrives on the scene with her big pair of maracas. Further investigation reveals that rather than being on industrial strength hallucinogens that day, the cast were recording a spoof episode for an internal Christmas tape that’s never been aired outside of ITV…until now that is.
From there it’s but a mere mouse-click to www.smh.com.au (we know, these addresses are getting out of hand) where Australia’s answer to Sinéad Ni Bheolain, Naomi Robson, can be heard berating a hapless autocue man oblivious of the fact that her mic is still on.
The normally butter wouldn’t melt in my mouth ‘caster manages to unleash an impressive seven “Fucks” in 34 seconds.
There was much sniggering the other week when the tape was given an airing on Triple J, the alternative Aussie rock station that’s taken a shine of late to The Frames. The perfect antedote to €50,000 Cash Calls and “wacky” morning crews, you can tune in online at www.abc.net.au/triplej
Which just leaves time for quick visits to http://leenks.com/link15637.htm (Budweiser employee sacked for drinking Coors); www.lightintheattic.net (super-hip Seattle reissue label); and www.bmezine.com (ouch, that must smart).