Sex & Drugs
25 Jul 07

The sex o'clock news

News and views from around the world, stimulation for the eyes and ears, Sexton's Miscellany plus this week's Top Sex Tip...

YOU CAN TAKE AWAY MY FREEDOM, JUST GIVE ME MY RAMPANT RABBIT
A female prisoner in the UK is demanding that jail officials allow her to have a Rampant Rabbit and is threatening to take her case to the European Court of Human Rights if she doesn’t get a vibrator. She claims that as electric shavers are allowed in prison, vibrators should be too. The prisoner, who claims to be a sex addict, notes that drug addicts get help and smokers are allowed cigarettes, but that sex addicts are left untreated and are not allowed conjugal visits or sex toys.

I WANNA TEXT YOU UP...AND TAKE A COFFEE BREAK
Oh dear... What’s wrong with humanity? A UK survey has found that most teens would rather give up sex for a month than give up their mobile phones. Although perhaps, being teens, they weren’t getting much nookie anyway. Even worse, the majority of the respondents aged over 45 would rather give up sex, chocolate, alcohol and their mobile phone instead of their favourite hot drink. Hey, I’m very fond of tea, but to give up all of life’s other pleasures for it – no way!

IRISH SEX LIVES – DUREX’S BIG SEX SURVEY
This year Durex asked a total of 1,096 Irish people in an online poll to dish the dirt on their sex lives, fantasies and safe sex practises. Here’s what they found:

37% of us think about sex between once and twice a day while 10% said they thought about sex more than 10 times a day. Those with over-active imaginations were mostly male. 25% of men but only 4% of women thought about sex 10 or more times each day.

Most of us fantasise about sex when we are doing our regular daily activities. 26% of us fantasise about sex at work, 25% fantasise when doing the cleaning and 5% of us fantasise about sex when walking the dog (though they need not necessarily be fantasising about the dog).

Who’s thinking about you? 53% of us fantasise about a good friend of the opposite sex, 25% of us think about a work colleague, 20% said they fantasised about their partner’s friend and 7% said they fantasised about their doctor or dentist. Dentist? Must be masochistic fantasies. Precisely 0% of respondents mentioned their grandparents or their vacuum cleaners...

On average, the Irish make love 165 times a year – just over three times a week. Not too shabby, but 64% of Irish people would like more sex even though 63% of us say we are happy with our sex lives.

20% of Irish people have had a threesome and 4% have tried swinging.

Sorry blokes, 52% of Irish women reckon size matters.

83% of us feel confident that our partners will not be shocked by our bedroom suggestions.

38% of Irish people have slept with between one and five people, 23% of us clock in at between five and 10 people and 4% of Irish people say they have slept with 50 people. Sadly 60% of us regret at least some of those partners.

43% of us have been unfaithful. (The other 57% may well be lying).

A shocking 39% of us don’t use a condom when we are being unfaithful to our regular partner and 8% never use any protection at all.

Of those of you who don’t use protection, 14% say it’s because it spoils the feeling, 5% of you are too embarrassed to suggest a condom and 4% are too drunk to care.

6% of Irish people have had an STI. That’s about 1 in 6 people.

WEB
WHAT’S YOUR EROTIC PERSONALITY TYPE?
Each of us has an erotic personality and to get the best out of our sex lives it’s important to know what gets your libido pumping. Author and erotic expert Sage Vivant’s book Your Erotic Personality: Identifying And Understanding Your Sexual Self explores this idea. Better yet, her website allows you to take a quick quiz to determine your own erotic personality. It only takes a few minutes and I found my analysis to be pretty damn accurate! You can also order a customised erotic story to appeal to your erotic personality type or an erotic illustration, with prices ranging from $45 to $450. See www.sagevivant.com.
THIS ISSUE'S TOP SEX TIP
Women like to be romanced. We like flowers, candlelight dinner and long, slow lovemaking sessions. But not all the time! Some times there is nothing better than a rough fast session where we feel physically dominated by our partners. Tear our clothes off and give it to us hard and fast!
Obviously it’s important to check her reaction when surprising your partner with rough sex. If she really isn’t into the idea right then, back off. Sex, even rough sex, is about both parties enjoying themselves. Coercion shouldn’t come into it.
Most women need foreplay to get in the mood. However, surprising her with the strength of your desire and need can often be enough to get her juices flowing without having to spend any time caressing her erogenous zones.
Better still, send her filthy texts during the day telling her that you are so horny you are going to rip off her knickers and take her as soon as you see her. That should get her imagination working overtime and ensure she’s ready when you are.