'Twas grim oop north

here’s an ad doing the rounds at the moment that’s putting my telly at serious risk.
Two French guys are sitting in a plush Parisian bar and, between ostentatious hair flicks and repositioning of sunglasses, they talk enviously about an absent friend. Said Monsieur, it seems, is currently to be found in Belfast, where, after a quick scene cut, we find him at the mercy of a number of local wise-arses who take the piss out of his accent and trick him into buying them a round. Because he’s French, you see, and therefore unable to deal with the manifold complexities and subtleties of life in ‘our wee country’.
Harf-harf-harf.
Given the open arms with which Belfast and Northern Ireland have welcomed its overseas immigrants over the past few years (and, as the PSNI will confirm, our locals seem to have lost little of their enthusiasm for robust ‘initiation’ ceremonies), one can only wonder at the rationale that inspired this particular campaign.
Accordingly, I feel impelled to use this end-of-year bye-bye to apologise.
It’s been a depressingly quiet year for music. During the last twelve months, the local scene has provided as much excitement and fun as the average Irish League season. But we’ll use this occasion to try to emphasise the positive.
Phil Kieran, Danny Todd and Martin Corrigan continued to make an impressive noise with Alloy Mental – injecting some much needed energy into the otherwise disappointingly flat Faithless/Kings Of Leon headliner at this year’s Vital event.
The year ahead is probably make or break for the trio. Then again, in their many various guises over the years, they’ve all heard that before. Any act that can whip up a dust storm in both Shine and Auntie Annie’s has to have some kind of chance.
Oppenheimer’s pristine sound was an unlikely, but most welcome, contribution from two long-term combatants on the Belfast scene – Shaun Robinson and Rocky O’Reilly. Mixing light-on-its-feet melodic electronic pop with the off-centre, lo-fi playfulness of Yo La Tengo, they proved to be the year’s most surprising treat.
Panda Kopanda’s Letting Go E.P will not provoke riots (or indeed dancing) in the streets. However, it will provide you with some welcome and easy company.
Fighting With Wire, Lafaro and The Answer have no such inhibitions. Northern bands have never been frightened of making noise and this bunch are having a ball fitting comfortably into that lineage. In The Answer’s case, their cheery good-humour and pro-active, up-and-at-’em attitude may even convert you to the joys of soft metal.
Tracer AMC and Robyn G Shiels proved to be exceptions in a year when very few of our acts released anything lasting more than 12 minutes. Their two LPs (locally produced and distributed, it must be added) were shining beacons of assertiveness during a period of grim creative passivity.
And try to catch Delaware if you possibly can. Unlike the majority of their contemporaries, they will definitely add some vivid colour to your life. After devouring the back catalogues of The Byrds, Neil Young, The Band and Crosby, Stills and Nash, this crowd don’t consider the job complete until they’ve added enough hooks and melodies to a song to bring you out in hives. They’re pretty great.
Next year, keep your fingers crossed for the promising Beat Poets and The Fast Emperors. Desert Hearts, meanwhile, are poised to release their long, long, long-awaited second LP.
Here’s hoping the class of 2006 perform better than their immediate predecessors. Maybe they can save us from the ad breaks.