Tool And The Trade

It wasn’t quite as bareknuckled as the “mention heroin and they’ll kick your head in” warning that pre-empted my 1995 chinwag with Alice In Chains, but the conditions for interviewing Tool were still pretty strident.

“You must be intimately acquainted with their new album, Lateralus.” I can do intimate. “The questions must be interesting and challenging or they’ll walk out.” Nobody’s ever complained about my technique before. “If the interview’s delayed for any reason, you’re not, repeat not, allowed to complain.” Mmmm, spot the band that’s just taken over from Destiny’s Child at the top of the US charts.

While such preciousness can never be condoned – especially by a journalist – it has to be said that Tool have more reason to be up-their-own-arses than most.

Unlike other members of the Frighteningly Loud Guitar Club, the Californian quartet have achieved their success sans toadying up to MTV, ripping off the Chilli Peppers/Public Enemy/Run DMC/The Clash or recruiting midget lookalikes.

Indeed, you have to go a long way back to find a number one American band who are so willfully uncommercial. Or as fond of Hob-Nobs.

“Van Halen had their M&Ms with the blue ones taken out, we have our Milk Chocolate Hob-Nobs,” drawls Adam Jones, the Stephen Spielberg SFX man-turned-Tool guitarist. “I don’t wish to appear unpatriotic, but your biscuits are much better than the ones we get at home. Here, have one.”

I don’t mind if I do. Chocolate biccy in hand, I decide to go straight for the jugular and ask what all this ‘intimately acquainted’, ‘interesting question’, ‘no complaining’ malarkey is all about.

“That’s just to keep you guys on your toes,” he laughs good-naturedly. “Not wanting to explain where our name comes from – for the eight hundredth time! – doesn’t mean that we’re prima donnas. In fact, I’d say we’re as down to earth as any band I’ve met.”

They must have the odd “Look at me, I’m a trillionaire rock star” moment.

“The most rock ‘n’ roll thing I do is play charades round at Tom Morello from Rage’s house. He’s a friend of mine from way back, so it’s not like hitting the Hollywood party circuit, which I hate. As soon as people start air kissing around me, that’s it, I’m off!

“The last time I was at Tom’s the teams included that Seth guy from Austin Powers, a couple of Chili Peppers and Twiggy Ramirez, who started off cool and disinterested but then got into it more than anybody else. I suppose when you’re playing with Marilyn Manson, charades become second nature!”

Parties at Tom Morello’s are one thing, but how did Tool manage to survive the orgy of decadence that is the Ozzfest?

“You really couldn’t hope to meet a nicer couple than Ozzy and Sharon. Not once, in all the time we toured with him, did he show us any attitude. More than that, he went out of his way to make sure we had everything we needed. Role model’s stretching it a bit, but I do admire the way he’s trawled rock ‘n’ roll’s murkiest depths and come up smiling. Unlike other people of his age, you don’t look at Ozzy and say ‘give it up!’”

What’s his take on their fellow Ozzfest-ers, Slipknot?

“Scary. With other bands you tend to think it’s an act, but Slipknot are full-on. As are the 14 and 15-year-olds that make up the majority of their audience. The emotion that comes out of those kids when they’re playing is amazing. I’m glad it’s them and not us wearing the masks. It gets hot enough on stage without having your head encased in latex.”

Asked about his formative years, Jones proudly admits to being “a geek.”

“Fortunately for me, I was surrounded by a lot of other outcast/underdog-types who were into stuff like Devo.”

Isn’t ‘Devo’ the name that Tool lead singer, Maynard, gave his nipper?

“Yeah, what a great start in life! Cooler still is the friend of mine who called his son Eno. If I was to follow suit, my first born would be King Crimson Jones!”

Well, it’s not as bad as Slaughter & The Dogs Clark. Given its abhorrence of all things immediate and commercial, were Tool surprised that Lateralus knocked Beyoncé and the girls off their perch?

“It blew our minds. We really thought that people would go, ‘God, this Tool album, man, it’s too prog!’ Thankfully, there are a lot more free thinkers out there than we thought.”

Mainstream commercial success or not – Lateralus went gold during its first week of release – Tool are determined to keep things as D-I-Y as possible.

“I’ve friends in bands who don’t get to see their videos until they’re on MTV. You ask ‘em how much they cost and they say, ‘I don’t know’. Well, they should know ‘cause they’re the ones who are paying for it! Videos are deserving of just as much creativity as a record, which is why we control every aspect of them ourselves.”

As someone who has experience of both, which is the more piranha-infested – the music or the film industry?

“Music,” comes the immediate response. “When Tom Cruise makes a movie, he gets a fee. Period. It’s not his responsibility to pay the other actors and crew. Bands, on the other hand, have to fund everything themselves out of their advance. It’s crazy.

“There’s a way around it, though, which is to become a piranha yourself. It takes away from the creativity a little bit, but you sleep better at night.”

Along with King Crimson, Jones also admits to Lateralus being influenced by Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, Orbital and, er, Mötley Crue.

“Yeah, there’s some of the ‘don’t give a fuck’ attitude that Mötley exhibited on their first two albums. We wouldn’t exist today without it.”

Tool’s Lateralus album is out now on Music For Nations.