Rant in D: The other end of the telescope

No point in being coy about this. I’ve a book coming out on February 5 entitled John the Revelator. It’s a novel, published by Faber & Faber, and I worked hard on it, and if it shortens anyone’s bus journey or waiting time in the doctor’s or motor tax office, hallelujah. Go buy it and make an old man very happy.

But that’s not the point of this issue’s rant. The point is what happens when the poacher turns gamekeeper (or vice versa – I can never figure out which is which). In other words, how your perspective changes when the roles are reversed and instead of conducting interviews or writing reviews of someone else’s work, you’re reading about your own.
It’s been educational. The process is primarily about surrendering control of words, the kind of thing that makes any journalist develop a twitchy eyelid. As you stifle the neurotic urge to phone up some hassled and deadline-beleagured reporter to correct some minor nuance of chronology or piffling detail no one else in the world gives a toss about, it makes you appreciate how patient most interviewees are, given the temptation to behave like a complete control freak or nudnik. Mind you, I’ve never produced my own tape recorder at the start of the conversation, as did one interviewee I encountered, a journalist himself, who should really have exhibited a better grasp of interview etiquette.
Anyway, it was with some bemusement I noted my own reaction when one interviewer described my kitchen as neat and sparse in print: I was as gratified as if she’d told me I’d just written Crime & Punishment (but then, I was up at dawn with the hoover and mop). Another revelation: it’s immensely satisfying when the journalist devotes the full review to the work at hand rather than wasting a precious couple of hundred words on biographical background or some rambling thesis (guilty, yer honour).
Issues of substance apart, one also realises to what extent an author gets annoyed on behalf of the reader when the reviewer gives away the plot. Can we call for a blanket ban on spoilers please?
All these lessons and observations I will endeavour to take back to the journalistic practise, enlightened by a spell on the other end of the telescope. I’ve been touched by the thought and time the ladies and gents of the press have put into considering this wee yarn I spent the last god knows how many years on. My warmest thanks to all. Good night and good luck.