- Culture
- 24 Nov 03
By Judy Cole (New York).
Q. I’d been going out with “Lance” for about three months, and everything was fine. He’s a brilliant lover, and also very well endowed. But one night last week, when I put my hand on his “package” to let him know I wanted to make love, I realised he was wearing my silk panties! My first thought was that he was joking around, so I laughed. But when I saw he was serious, I was gob-smacked.
Lance swore he’s not gay, and said he just likes the way the silk feels down there. He took off the panties at once and we went at it, but I could tell he was holding back, and he’s been distant ever since. I’d hate to lose him, but I just don’t know what to make of the situation. What’s your take?
A. When a man tells you he “just likes the feel” of silky fabric on his manly parts, that is, in part, true. Of course, there’s more to it. My guess is your Lance is a cross-dresser who’s reached an emotional crossroads. The good news is that he must truly care about you if he’s willing to expose the fem side of his sexual persona. He’s letting you know he trusts you and he’s seeking your approval.
The other silver lining to this dark cloud is that if Lance tells you he’s straight, there’s a good chance he is. Many cross-dressing males are 100-percent hetero. If he’s not eye-balling the cute barman at your local pub (or, worse, balling him!) chances are, he’s straight… or rather, bent, but not bent “that way”.
What happens next is up to you. If you can embrace his dainty ways, you may be in for the ride of your life. If you can’t deal, he may simply shut the door on his desires and put on a brave face for you. If he does that, however, be aware that the Jones will always be with him, and chances are, it will only grow more pronounced the more he feels it’s forbidden.
If he’s as good a lover as you claim, my advice would be to buy him some racy lingerie of his own, and let him continue to satisfy your kink while indulging his own.
Q. I’ve got a pretty sizable member, and I know how to use it. I’m not bad to look at, either. I’m thinking I should pursue a career in the adult film industry. What’s the best way for me to become a porno star?
Advertisement
A. While any jizz-addled idiot with a webcam can broadcast his or her sexcapades over the Internet these days, men who have what it takes to be top-of-the-line porn stars are few and far between. Judging by what I’ve seen, looks don’t count as much as stamina and being able to get wood and pop a load on demand. Porn is a business, and when push comes to shove, making X-rated movies can be tedious work. Could you truly concentrate on doing the deed with a boom mike hanging over your head; stay hard with bright lights blinding you; and keep pumping away as a crazed director machine-guns directions at you as a gaggle of people mill about doing the work of getting a film made? Not bloody likely.