In the cinema, as in life, no one really needs to spend two and a half hours watching egomaniac men with Mummy issues enter into, ahem, a cape-swinging contest. (That’s what the Republican primaries are for, ammiright?) So does Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice amount to more than that?

The premise of Batman V. Superman is intriguing, as the citizens of Gotham and Metropolis begin to hold Batman (Ben Affleck, in a constant state of “I stubbed my toe” growliness) and Superman (Henry Cavill, the most beautiful blank slate working today) accountable for the death and destruction, which their vigilantism has wreaked on their respective cities.

Thanks to the media propaganda wars and some devious plotting by Lex Luther (Jesse Eisenberg portraying Evil via Twitchy Hyperactivity), the two heroes turn against one another for the “But I’m a Better Morally Ambiguous Super Guardian Crimefighter Than You” showdown.

Unfortunately, director Zach Snyder’s scattershot, overly complicated and hugely drawn-out exposition depletes the story of all its fun and power, reducing his leads to impotent cranks. The action, meanwhile, is visually unimaginative and perfunctory. Synder’s Man V. God, Dark V. Light, Loner Bachelor V. Loved-Up Wannabe Family Man dynamic feels underdeveloped.

He also distastefully evokes both 9/11 and America’s anti-“illegal alien” immigration laws to make cheap allegories that are immediately abandoned. Most frustratingly, the action and battles all seem to happen because of the most basic lack of understanding. There are moments when you think that the film’s entire plot could have been solved via a Whatsapp group text.

One successful deployment of magic, mischief and melodrama is the appearance of Gal Gadot’s Wonder Woman, whose power and presence is brilliantly captured by Hans Zimmer’s thrilling score. As the only tantalisingly underused element in a film marked by an overall feeling of indulgence, Batman V. Superman at least builds momentum for Gadot’s upcoming spin-off.