We start this edition of Caught In The Net with news of a dispute that has ripped our favourite part of Eastern Europe apart.

“Slovenia defied its reputation for traditional values when a group of three transvestites called The Sisters won the right to represent the country in the upcoming Eurosong contest in Estonia,” reads the report at www.time.com/time/europe/eu/daily/0,9868,212343,00.html “The trio – made up of lead singer Miss Marlena, Daphne and Emperatrizz – received the maximum available points from the judges for their song, ‘Only Love’. The juries’ votes gave the trio the win by a single vote, despite apparently overwhelming public ‘tele-vote’ support for the second-place finisher, Karmen Stavec.”

To cut a long story short, the original result has now been overturned, with Parliament, the Catholic Church and TV Slovenia all adding their tolar’s worth (research or what?) to the debate.

Next up on our smorgasbord of web-ian delights is The Useless Pages, “a grand directory of sites whose makers obviously have too little talent and too much time on their hands.”

The less than essential resources listed by www.go2net.com/useless include:

Nip Guards – Warning: Contains example picture of bleeding male nipple

Pictures Of Chickens

Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie

Derek’s Wal-Mart Purchase Receipts

How To Eat Maggots

The answer to the latter, in case your wondering, is boiled with a pinch of salt and then tossed in soy sauce. Scrummy!

Given the huge amount of space cadets that read Hotpress, we thought you’d be interested in the services provided by the UFO Abduction Insurance Company. Pay the American set-up an annual $20 premium, and should you be abducted by aliens, you or your dependents will receive a whopping $10 million. There’s an even bigger payout if you’re eaten by one of our extraterrestial neighbours or stranded on a farflung planet. You can find out more at www.ufo2001.com

Which just leaves us with time for quick visits to the totally addictive urban myth/conspiracy theory/nutter site www.snopes.com and the interactive version of the current Warhol retrospective that can be found at www.tate.org – Marilyn, Campbell’s soup cans, Mickey Mouse and Chairman Mao, they’re all just a mouse-click away.