All of Caught In The Net’s Christmases, Hanukkahs, Dimwalis, Ramadans, International Atheist Days etc. etc. came at once last week when during some essential YouTube-ing – we weren’t skiving, Niall, honest! – we stumbled across the new Alan Partridge series, Mid Morning Matters.

The first sighting of the great man since 2005 when we saw him hanging out at Radio Norwich with Roger Daltrey, the 12 new episodes have been sponsored by the Foster’s lager people who are premiering them every Friday on www.fostersfunny.co.uk/alanpartridge.
“I am delighted to announce that after years as a regional broadcaster on North Norfolk Digital my groundbreaking radio segment, Mid Morning Matters, will now be accessible to a potential audience of billions via the World Wide Web,” Alan enthuses. “That it has taken Foster’s to help realise my dream of joining the information superhighway is a damning indictment of the established broadcasters and their shabby treatment of me. I look forward to ‘hanging out ‘n’ chillin’ with the MySpace generation.”
Future episodes will see him confronting an Alan Partridge Twitter imposter, hosting a phone-in to find Norfolk’s greatest ever person (it ends up being a two-way duke out between Horatio Nelson and Delia Smith) and extolling the virtues of Billie Piper.
“‘I like her face. She has a very round cherubic face, rather like a Victorian doll that’s somehow been re-animated,” he explains. “Say what you like about Billie Piper, but she is the most popular prostitute on ITV.”
From there it’s but a mere mouse-click to www.thepipethefilm.com where you can see the trailer for Risteard Ó Domhnaill’s documentary on “the ongoing battle between Shell Oil and the Irish coastal town of Rossport whose small but familial community found themselves thrown to the wolves by the government which should have been protecting them.”
The film festival reviews so far have been universally positive with Screen International describing it as “provocative and challenging”, Variety adjudging it to be “first-rate” and Time Out branding it “compelling… startlingly honest.”
Which just leaves time for quick visits to www.deanmorriscards.co.uk (excellent range of rude greetings cards); www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOF1FJ7wGhw (Kings Of Leon having a ‘mare. Allegedly!); and www.krakowpost.com/article/2433 (The world’s tallest Jesus Christ).