The human body is a remarkable thing. No sooner have you mastered the known zones, learnt the gentle art of oral sex and spent several hours locating the G-spot, than some smart alec comes along and finds yet another erogenous zone for you, courageous explorers all, to conquer. And so it is this week!

Yes, you read it right: on this occasion your intrepid reporter from the frontlines of the dating and mating game hasn’t done all the work for you. Instead, I am setting you a challenge – go forth and find the X-spot.
Bodies, like people, differ. Most individuals have at least one particular place, the stimulation of which drives them crazy with desire. Rub it, tickle it, lick it or kiss it and you’re guaranteed the gold. The trick is locating this prize place, as what’s sauce for the goose is not necessarily sauce for the gander. I call this erogenous zone the X-spot.
The difficulty with finding a new lover’s X-spot is two-fold. In some cases, the X-spot is so weird and silly that your lover may be too embarrassed to tell you. Or, indeed, they may not know they have one until a skilful lover locates it. The trick is never to underestimate the erotic potential of any part of the body. You may be more than just pleasantly surprised.
There are some easy ways to begin the search. In addition to genital stimulation, most people enjoy it if you play with their ears, lips, neck, breasts, back, ass and thighs. As you explore these different areas, watch out for a strong reaction to touching, kissing and licking. Encourage your partner to communicate, to let you know what he or she likes. If the reaction is especially strong, if the pleasure you’re giving is appreciated in an exceptional way, then you may have found their X-spot. Go with it.
Don’t use this simply as a way to get the ball rolling. Lavish attention on his or her particular special area. Vary pressure and try different kinds of stimulation. Remember, sex may be great physical exercise but it’s not a sport and the goal is not necessarily – and it is certainly not only – to make your partner come.
The green-eyed monster is a terrible thing, but I admit I am jealous of women who can orgasm simply by having their breasts stimulated. Most sex reports will tell you that these women are few and far between, but I suspect this may have just a little bit to do with the type and quality of the stimulation most of us are receiving.
My nipples are, of course, sensitive. Sometimes too much so, and after a while what was pleasurable becomes painful. However, when my lovely Conor licks the underside of my breasts, I melt. I can understand the attraction of nipples – they stand to attention and are pretty much in the centre, but the breasts have a whole lot more to offer than just these enticing beacons.
They may be small, they may be large – but whatever their shape or size, don’t ignore these wonderful globes. By all means, treat her lovely nipples with due respect, but there’s pleasure to be given across the entire surface, so touch and stroke and lick and love for all your worth! Even if this doesn’t drive your girlfriend wild with lust, almost certainly she’ll appreciate being appreciated.
The second likely way of locating the X-spot is to pay attention to the in-between areas. These are the areas where one part of the body joins the other – for example, the top of the neck, the inner elbow, the wrists, the inner thigh, the bottom of the ass and the back of the knees.
All of these parts of my body are notably sensitive. And although I believed my mother when she told me I was special, I’m sure I’m not completely unique in this! Places like the inside of the elbow are often overlooked and it’s a pity. Great sex has far more to do with great foreplay than is often recognised, so be adventurous and you shall have your rewards in a very different kind of heaven!
The final way to find the X-spot is also the most pleasurable, and the method is simplicity itself. You simply start at the top of your lover’s head and work your way down. Don’t ignore any part of the body, take your time and be sensitive to your lover’s responses. It’s probably a good idea not to say what you are about to do, as this may make a new lover feel self-conscious. But once the journey begins, it can turn into a genuine erotic adventure, potentially just as memorable as any trip around the world.
The great thing about the X-spot is that it is often a seemingly innocent part of the body, such as the fingers or stomach. This means that much fun can be had on the bus, in the pub – or in any other public place. A while ago I was seeing a great guy who had a large scar on the back of his head from a doctor’s over-enthusiastic use of a forceps – as he was being born, that is! If I stoked it gently he went completely limp and probably would have signed over his life savings if I had been sneaky enough to ask.
The strangest parts of the body may be erotic hotspots. I know this because my own X-spot is pretty weird – the ankles.
I remained innocent of the ankle factor for many years until an ex-boyfriend decided to bite them as a joke. I don’t know which of us was more surprised by my reaction, but it was like finding the mother lode. Sure every time I’ve mentioned this to new lovers they do tend to look at me as if I’m a bit odd – but not so much so that they are inhibited from venturing further south, so I’m not complaining.
Far too often, people tend to zone in on the sure-fire erotic areas. This is grand, and a step up from the basic shag which far too many people mistake for the staple of a good sex life.
Anyone with a basic manual to the human body can do this. But you, my hardy readers are made of sterner stuff. Locating the X-spot may not be as easy, but I promise it’s worth the trouble.
You don’t need a map, you don’t need a compass, and you don’t even need a special pair of shoes – unless you’re into that kind of thing, of course.