"...so I finally got home to Kells on the 22nd and a mate of mine says to me, 'Are you finished work for Christmas.' I just laughed and replied, 'mate, I finished up work ten years ago!'"

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, let's give a big hand for one Ireland's most inimitable comedians. A man who's graced the stage with the likes of Tommy Tiernan, Dara O Brian, Ross Noble, Jason Byrne, Neil Delamere and Des Bishop, he's also the same face that you've seen crop up on Republic of Telly, Operation Transportation, Savage Eye, and a bunch of other shows it'd take us too long to mention.

A man who very modestly admits that being a comedian means he has the best job in the world (no job for him at all, in fact), Fred Cooke might be in for one of his unique gigs yet this weekend - joining in the celebrations (or easing the woes, as the case may be) of the crowds who've spent the day at the Dublin Racing Festival. What does he have in store for us then?

"Ah it'll be quite musical from the start!" he says excitedly. "More so than ever, the shows have taken a musical turn. I think I describe what I do as taking popular guitar riffs and making jokes out of them. So what have I been doing recently? I haven't gone down the parody road just yet. At the moment it's very much taking music and applying it to those situations in life which I've always found comedic.
"You know, I've always loved making fun of authority. Not in a renegade sense, just poking fun. For example, I get so much fun poking fun at the Guards. And I love school as well, I find a lot of comedy in that. Especially my Leaving Cert...I don't think I've ever quite got over my Leaving Cert. School's still terrifying for me, it still creeps up on your mind all the time (laughs). So when I'm hungover and I have the fear, I always revert back to stupid things that happened to me in Secondary School twenty years ago. That's when I'll turn round and try to make something funny out of it."

Fred's on a delicious line-up that sees him sharing a stage with the likes of Gearoid Farrelly, Eric Lalor, Danny O'Brien and Alison Spittle. There'll also be live music courtesy of Damian Dempsey, Vogue Williams and Stockton's Wing (who Fred assures me will bring down the house, having seen them support Michael Jackson in Cork when he was all of eight years old).

Would he have much experience at the races?

"No! Haha, I've never been before in my life so I'm really looking forward to this!

"But I would make the odd bet every now and again. I won 15 euro in Galway once and spent all my winnings straight away at Supermacs. Then on St. Stephen's Day I tried to make a bet on a race that had already ran. The woman at the bookies had to explain to me why I couldn't. A few years ago I thought I made a mint on a 10/1 bet, turned out with was 1/10. Think I made about 45 cent from that one. So luck hasn't always been on my side when it comes to racing. But I'll be looking forward to this weekend. Maybe this'll be my time to win big..."

We've got our hopes up for you Fred... Tickets for the Dublin Racing Festival are still available. Get them while their hot: www.leopardsotwn.com/Dublin-Racing-Festival