The Roy Keane/Saipan saga will doubtless go down as one of the most traumatic events in Irish sporting history. Make that Irish history – period! For in truth, it went way beyond sport, gripping the entire nation while it played out over that sunny week in June of 2002 when our World Cup hopes seemed to evaporate in an instant.

Almost three years after those calamitous events the drama of Saipan is being re-lived once again, only this time in a lavish stage musical - set in ancient Roman times! I Keano is written by Arthur Mathews (of Fr. Ted fame) and Mick Nugent with lyrics and music by Paul Woodfull. Directed by Peter Sheridan it is headed by a heavyweight cast-list includes Après Match stalwarts Risteárd Cooper and Gary Cooke, Mario Rosenstock of Gift Grub fame and Tara Flynn, one of the original Nualas. The action in I Keano takes place as an ancient Federation sends an army to an island to prepare for a momentous war.
“It’s in the grand tradition of stupid musicals about unlikely topics,” says Mathews of his creation. “It’s Spartacus- meets-Carry On Up Pompeii- meets-Gaels of Laughter, with a bit of Andrew Lloyd Webber thrown in. It’s epic in every sense. It has everything in it, big chorus numbers with lots of choreography and a dramatic climax.”
For those of you who were camping out on Jupiter at the time of Saipan, the original story goes something like this: It’s summer 2002 and the Irish World Cup squad arrive in the “idyllic” Pacific island of Saipan for a spot of light training, acclimatisation and R ‘n’ R before the real action begins in Japan/Korea. The sun is shining, spirits are high and everyone is happy. Everyone except Roy Keane that is! The sullen Corkman isn’t at all impressed with what he sees as piss-poor facilities and a lack of proper preparation. A row with team boss Mick McCarthy ensues, precipitating the most infamous walk-out in sporting history. In one fell swoop our greatest player decides that walking his dog in the Cheshire countryside is more preferable than leading his country from the front.
Meanwhile, back home, a nation holds its collective breath. The unthinkable has happened. Our one world class talent has walked out leaving us high and dry! Why? And who is to blame? And what can we do to put things right again? Disbelief turns to anger and the country turns on itself. Not since the civil war have a people been so divided. They fall into two distinct camps – those who agree with Keano and those who side with McCarthy. But most agree that the team is worse off with Keano and with the clock ticking rapidly towards kick-off, a gargantuan effort is made to reconcile the two. RTE’s Tommy Gorman is despatched for an audience with the man himself while Eamon Dunphy speaks in sombre tones on his nightly radio programme, giving a minute-by-minute update on the situation.
“Looking back it’s hard to believe just how much it gripped the nation,” Mathews reflects. “It made for riveting television and radio at the time and we all lapped it up. It was only sport but it put September 11 into the halfpenny place as far as the Irish public was concerned.”
The Saipan saga was clearly ripe for the picking and something along the lines of I Keano was probably inevitable. But what possessed Mathews to delve into an area he had never worked in before and turn the story into a musical?
“It just seemed like a good idea,” he says. “Saipan was an epic drama and it had all the elements of a Greek tragedy being played out before our eyes. Then I saw the Jerry Springer Opera and I thought it might work that way, although Jerry Springer is a real opera whereas this has elements of musicals and panto and all sorts of other stuff. It was quite simple to write. The story was all there. I didn’t have to make up anything. And it seemed to fit that ancient Rome/Spartacus thing and I’ve always liked the kind of Andrew Lloyd Webber approach to big events.”
The show features all the main players in the Saipan drama, including the main protagonists, Keano, described in the pre-publicity blurb as “a warrior with a passion for perfection, exceeded only by his fierce and unpredictable temper”, and Macartacus, “the earnest but stubborn General”. He is aided by the enthusiastic peacemaker Quinnus, “who builds children’s hospitals and gets PR advice from his wife Surfia”. As the drama unfolds Keano is torn between the conflicting advice of the Scottish dolphin god, Fergia, and the tap-dancing wood nymph Dunphia. Other key players in the drama include Packie Bonnerus and “embedded” journalists including Obsequius, the bearded Mischevus, and “the pleading” Tommy Gormanus. “Some of the characters are based on real people while others are generic,” Mathews says. “I don’t like using real people all the time as it can restrict you.”
Risteard Cooper, known for his Après Match antics, plays two characters in the production – Quinnus and Tommy Gormanus. He reckons it’s one of the most challenging productions he’s been involved in.
“It’s unprecedented in terms of what it is,” he says “A musical comedy is one thing but setting it against a Roman backdrop with real people being portrayed is completely mental. The fact that there are these big production numbers as well makes it more challenging. It’s not as if we were dancers or anything like that. Just putting one foot in front of the other was a challenge for me. That said, the rehearsals have gone well. There’s the basic story – a story that we all know which in some ways makes it easier for us. It’s about trying to make it as funny and interesting and silly as possible. But I think what actually happened is funny so in some ways that takes care of itself.”
Does Mathews envisage I Keano being staged around the country or even further afield? “If it does it does. But I’m not looking beyond the Olympia at this stage,” he says. “It’s booked in for a couple of weeks. I had no great ambitions for it I thought it might be run in Andrews Lane at first. So in football parlance we’ll get the home game out of the way before we think about Europe.”
Finally has he had any feedback from any of the protagonists in the Saipan story? “No not yet,” he says. “I only know that a guy in the Observer rang around but everyone was busy. Dunphy is being quite gracious about it so far but we’ll have to wait and see his reaction when it opens.
“This is all to do with the healing process,” he concludes. “I hope it gives some perspective to the whole sorry saga and brings some closure to it.”

I Keano previews Thurs 3rd, Fri 4th and Sat 5th Feb ‘05. Tickets from €20.00 including booking fee. Opening night is Tuesday 8th Feb running until Saturday 12th February ‘05. Tickets from €22.50 including booking fee.